Namaste My Brothers,

Two weekends back i had a quick trip to Shanghai for the wedding of one of my best friends from my university days and am finally recovering enough from the build-up of everything in the wake of all my recent travels to post again.

This is going to end up being a rather huge post, but there’s a lot I’d like to share, so here i go…

It's great to get updates on how people are doing, and I’d like to shoot back a few quick questions for everyone who’s had a chance to share.

Rocco, how are things going at the airport? More smiling travelers, i hope?

Dan, are you continuing to give much deeksha and is your process continuing to deepen as well?

No worries about preaching, Forrest. It's beautiful what you shared about your process, and it's great to be reminded of the importance of each one of us being able to completely accept where we are and also the importance of accepting when others aren’t willing to directly receive the blessings of Grace. I think another thing for us to remember is that it is not our Grace that they are refusing, and so it is not us that that they are rejecting…They are simply not willing or not able to connect to what is True (or to what is Love or to what is Present), and, for whatever reasons, that is the place where they are meant to be at that time. When talking about deeksha, i have found great support in asking The Presence to speak through me, but i’ll write more about that below.

Bill, are you getting the opportunity to give much deeksha? How is the "coming of the new" progressing?

Sajan, even though you feel that your state has stepped down, are you still able to connect to The Presence the way we did so strongly in GC? Have the sensations you experience while giving deeksha continued to become more powerful, or have they abated somewhat as well? Are many people still coming for deeksha at your place?

For me, the most significant change from life before GC is still that connection to The Presence, both the ease of invoking it as well as the naturally rising propensity for making the invocation. Everything else has its foundation on top of that, and, without it, i imagine all else would collapse. And thus my blessing so far has been to be able to look to make that connection, to have the thought to make that connection come to me in any number of different circumstances...just walking down the street, taking a shower, eating, meditating, writing, while i do yoga...

But especially when i'm talking to people. Whenever a quick request is made to The Presence to speak through me, i find that the connection to whomever i am talking to is immediately deepened. It's not me they're connecting to - it's The Presence that has come to their subconscious awareness that they are connecting to, and I find that it not only guides my voice but also the language of my entire body as well…and i am simply experiencing the blessing of watching.

As this thought to make the connection occurs more often, it builds on itself and deepens, but there have been a few other things that have helped for me as well…

I find myself giving smarana deeksha quite often. Because my mother isn't completely open yet to the nature of the blessings i have received, she has not asked me for deeksha, so i am giving her smarana deeksha about once a week. Once a week I also give smarana deeksha to many of my friends and relatives around the world who i feel need it, and these intention deekshas have been very beautiful connections to The Presence.

With inspiration from Patrick (who first told me about doing it on his flight) and also partly following Rocco's lead, i have given intention deeksha to people en masse while on planes or taking the subway. In addition to being a beautiful way to pass time, smarana deeksha helps me to reinforce connections to everything and everyone around…and of course negates any charge that might arise from some old lady elbowing me in the gut as she jostles for position to get out the train…

I also had a quite powerful experience about 3 weeks ago that was a definite continuation of The Process for me and a deeper version of what i wrote about in the last post, as the issue involved is a very deep issue for me.

I was at home one night with my mom (we live together), who had just finished cooking a load of delicious dishes earlier that day. While i was in the kitchen heating everything up, my mom called out a few requests to me, and i felt a quick flush of frustration at another set of demands from her. To this, i asked myself, "Why are you reacting so selfishly and horribly? Does your mother not do so much for you, care so much for you, love you so much?" And i found myself falling into the old habit of turning away from that bit of darkness inside and quickly smiling again as i readied for a feast and enjoyed a relaxing night at home with my mom.

I awoke the next morning at about 4 AM, completely nauseous, and within a few minutes was vomiting out what was left of dinner from the night before. After passing out again, i woke around 9, horribly sick with fever, weakness, and an ache that raged through my entire body.

My mom joked with me that she had poisoned me, but later that afternoon, i would realize that there was some truth to her jest. When she went out to run some errands, i asked Bhagavan to show me if there was something i needed to see that had made me so sick and so suddenly so. And he helped me to see that, although my mother of course never intended to poison me, because of my own unresolved issues, i, in some way, took what my mom had gifted me as poison.

As much as part of me does love my mother very much and appreciates what she does for me, i saw how another part of me fears being held so tightly by my mother that neither of us can be truly free. Though i had seen this fear before, this time i would be shown more, and i asked Bhagavan and The Presence to let me experience it all...I saw how much i depend on her for so many things - she cooks for me, cleans for me, and takes care of everything at home - and how useless part of me feels at having to rely on someone else for all this. I saw how, at the same time, i was afraid of not having someone to take care of me. And i saw how much i hated myself for all these fears and weaknesses and for not being able to truly and fully accept the love and care that my mother gives me.

As i condemned myself in guilt and self-loathing, i found myself screaming and crying and pounding my bed as all of this enveloped me. I continued to pray to Bhagavan and to The Presence to let me completely take in and endure the darkness inside, to help me face these fears and weaknesses, to give me strength, and to allow myself to accept What Is. As I reached the depths of all this darkness, as the experience of it completely enveloped me, The Divine lovingly smiled at me for opening to the Truth and instantaneously blessed me with the experience of being able to embrace It all with clarity and joy, as He had so many times before in GC. As we have all been shown and experienced, what we perceive as darkness is simply one aspect of What Is, and our liberation comes from complete clarity about It and then completely accepting It.

I awoke the next morning still a bit low in energy, but the sickness had completely passed otherwise, and i simply gave thanks for a beautiful (if strenuous!) experience and prayed that i will remain open to seeing, accepting, and experiencing.

One last thing to share that has worked very well for me has been prana kriya. Starting from about a week ago, i have been practicing it every morning, and it has been phenomenal.

The experiences of energy during the practice have been very powerful. While breathing and focusing attention on the connection between thumbs and forefingers in each mudra, i can feel each point of contact expand into a glowing ball, sometimes shooting energy all the way through my body into the chakras; and during the stage of kundalini rising for each chakra - so, so much joy…And not only that, but prana kriya has definitely helped me to be more aware of and attuned to The Presence throughout each day.

Oddly, i didn’t take very good notes on Sujayji's prana kriya instructions, so if someone does have detailed instructions, please let me know if you wouldn’t mind sharing them. I’d also be happy to share with anyone who wants to follow the procedure as i remember it, so if anyone wants that, just let me know.

OK - this has definitely gone on for long enough. Hope at least some of it is helpful for someone and to hear back from ya’ll soon!